So…this past year, y’all. smh. WOW. No words. (Just kidding!! 😂)
Actually- many times there truly weren’t words to describe my head and my heart. Hopeless, even though I know I have hope. Helpless, though I am blessed with amazing help. Dark, though I have the Light. Wrong, even when I thought I was right. Kind of sounds a song, but it passed more like a slow-motion nightmare. I fight every day to stay positive, and share something encouraging with you. It’s really for me, y’all.
Do you do that, too? It helps keep me accountable, to myself, my family, and most importantly…to my God. He knows my heart. He knows my thoughts. THAT is incredibly humbling. This season has been exactly that.
Humbling.
Can we take a trip back for a moment? One of the greatest joys I have known is to speak what He’s put on my heart. First school, with expectant faces of second graders or kindergarteners waiting to learn. And later in several businesses with others who rallied together with me. To lead, a team in whatever He’s placed in my heart at the time. To coach and teach others, and help someone see the positive side of their goals and life, and one of my favorite things?
Is to write.
Whatever the Lord puts on my heart to share. Tonight is one of those nights.
Humbling, because I went from hosting, to back up facilitator, to facilitating my own class filled with new friends who became a rich family to me, to traveling and being presented with the honor of Woman of the Year in our program (That still floors me, and I’m incredibly grateful for the memories!) to the excitement of speaking in our 24 hr blitz(SO fun!), greeting new members into the coaching program, earning as a paid facilitator for what I loved to do, and the list goes on…
Then.
Everything dissipated- one by one, until all of the wonderful things I loved doing, faded away.
The world became grey. And many times, I mindlessly turned to food.
The more intense the pain in my body-and in my heart became-the more I ate. I was no longer able to walk much-or far, so that small comfort made the ability to keep moving- worse.
Movement is life, y’all. Don’t ever stop.
But that reminds me of the vertigo therapy-which, I still do every single day. THAT kind of movement I would enjoy doing without. 😉 I am grateful the world stopped spinning, and now it just tries…then settles before it gets bad. I’ll actually take the therapy over the vertigo, any day.
Today? My heart knows His mercies are new every morning, and I can say without one doubt, that GREAT is His faithfulness.
Roy and the boys have truly been- for lack of a better word…amazing. I’m so incredibly grateful.
For the past several months, I’ve been in “student mode.” Leadership is something I love! But…I will not pretend to lead when I am not yet able to lead myself. If no one is following, that person is just taking a walk, anyway.
Right now? I’m barely able to do that, either, but I’ll keep trying!
Thank you for listening. All of that said, please bear with me. I have determined in my heart that I am not giving up! The posts won’t normally be this length. (That’s not the plan, anyway! :)!) But, I wanted to share my heart with you…give you a true picture of what’s been the reality, and to share this blessing with you, as well:
I have started on a diabetes prevention program. A simple info page allows you to see if you qualify to do it, too. If your insurance covers this program, the insurance pays everything, and they send you a free scale and Fitbit, as well.
I received my scale, today!
Thank you for your prayers, as I begin what has been a daily challenge for a very long time. This year, I’m making a change. I am aware that it will take continued effort on my part. I will follow this program for a year. The decision has been made. <3 Thanks in advance for your encouragement in this critical area. It’s been a long time coming. (The change. Not your encouragement.) <3
I love you all! Thanks again for coming alongside me on this very unfamiliar lately path of discipline for my positive health, both mentally and physically. I appreciate you much more than you know. I can’t wait to get back to the real Donna. In reality, it’s been me-all along. I just have to step back into whatever it is I’m supposed to do now. Meanwhile, with His help, I will remain strong. (When I am weak, He is strong!) #MSWarrior #girlinterrupted #Iwillfight #Iwillwin #Iwillbeback #stayrich
Donna Thomas